I can't wait for this summer to be over. I can't believe I'm even writing that! It has been way too hot, way too humid, and because of the medication I'm on, frankly, I am sick of sweating.
Summer doesn't mean to me what it used to when I was a kid. It was freedom from school and summers in Old Forge. It was the yardstick I used to measure the differences in me from one year to the next. It was playing outside until darkness fell and someone's parent was calling them in the house. Summer was riding bikes and playing jacks.
As I got older, July and August became lazy days. I would listen to my albums with the volume turned up while lying on the living room floor and the windows wide open. The windows remained open when I played the piano and the breeze made the drapes dance. Sometimes I would wonder if anyone could hear me. I hated playing in front of people. Playing was my stress reliever. It was my escape. I didn't need an audience for that.
As my responsibilities grew summer's joy waned and the years all just became one run on sentence.
When people talk and laugh about going back in time to a certain age to live it again, I never say I would want to do that. There is too much to have to learn again plus I am finally comfortable with who I am. What I do wish I could recapture are the summers and the feelings I had during them when I was young. It wasn't all sunshine and apple pie, but they were still good.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
The End - Part 8
Trepidation, curiosity, and excitement filled me as Det. Lewis and I walked down the hall, took a left, walked down another hall and came to the double doors of the courtroom. I entered through the door on the left with no further conversation or instructions other than what was said to me before. Keep my eyes on the State's Attorney. Answer her questions as previously discussed. It's all just a conversation between her and me.
When I walked in I had no idea where to go! Where was the so-called stand? There wasn't one...at least not like in the movies or traffic court. No one directed me so I stopped moving forward while my eyes swept over the room trying to decide the direction I should take. The rows of benches were on my right. Ahead of me and at the end of the room was the jury on the left and the judge straight ahead. In front of the judge were two tables pushed together where the prosecution and defense were sitting along with the accused. The court stenographer was somewhere sandwiched in between the tables and the judge's bench along with a burly and unsmiling officer of the law.
Since no one was directing me and I still didn't clearly see where I should sit, I just started to walk straight ahead. As I neared the front, the judge yelled at me to stop and pointed to the chair I should take. Geesh! I'm new at this! And Holy cow! I have to walk right behind the accused and then practically sit on his lap!? Imagine this part of the courtroom to be a rectangle. The judge was the long line at the top. The jury was the short line on the left. The lawyers and the accused were the long line at the bottom and I and the heat were the short line on the right with me closest to bottom.
Before I sat down I was sworn in. "I do." Two simple words that somehow made the judge take his eyes off of whatever paperwork he had on his desk and look up at me. I was told to sit so I did. The chair was inside of a type of booth and when I looked straight ahead there was the jury. I had to turn my head to the left to see the lawyer's tables. It all seemed like such an odd way to have things set up. The lawyers were sitting close enough to each other they could compare manicures and the jurors on the far left did not have a clear visual path to the person that was testifying.
I started off in a state of controlled fear but soon relaxed. The defense lawyer was a young woman that didn't look scary and the accused wouldn't look at me at all. He was probably drilled not to do so as it would have been interpreted as aggressive. The state asked her questions and they were pretty much what we already reviewed. I think she would have hopped on the table and cheered if she could have because of how I responded.
At one point the SA asked me about how I had described the guy's build in my statement. She then asked me if anyone in the courtroom had that kind of build. Well, Mr. Law Enforcement was a big guy so he fit the bill and since up until that point I had only seen the accused seated, I had no idea what his build was. I pointed out the trooper, or whatever he was. They jury laughed and the judge made a face. The SA asked the judge if she could ask the accused to stand and was given permission. The second he stood up I recognized him as the man. There was no doubt in my mind and I said so.
The defense lawyer(dl) now had her turn. I was all set for battle but there wasn't one. I wondered if she had given up because she didn't believe his innocense so didn't care and was just doing the minimum. I found out later that he had concocted some insane story in his defense that no one in their right mind would believe...even if it were a movie of the week. The dl asked me why I had to wear glasses. I told her it was because I have an astigmatism. She then asked me to explain what that is. I'm sure she wasn't expecting my trying to describe the deformity to the lens of the eyeball that causes it. Eventually she asked me a very stupid question. She said, "So, without your glasses your vision is blurry." I know. That wasn't really a question, but I had an answer. I looked at her and said, "Hence the glasses." I was proud of myself as I had made the jury laugh again! Even the judge and the trooper had to smile.
The SA had just a few follow-up questions for clarification purposes and then the judge told me I was excused to go. As I was getting my purse and standing up to leave he said, "That was a special testimony."
The guy ended up being found guilty. He was sentenced to 30 years. The SA thinks he will have to serve about 24 of those.
When I walked in I had no idea where to go! Where was the so-called stand? There wasn't one...at least not like in the movies or traffic court. No one directed me so I stopped moving forward while my eyes swept over the room trying to decide the direction I should take. The rows of benches were on my right. Ahead of me and at the end of the room was the jury on the left and the judge straight ahead. In front of the judge were two tables pushed together where the prosecution and defense were sitting along with the accused. The court stenographer was somewhere sandwiched in between the tables and the judge's bench along with a burly and unsmiling officer of the law.
Since no one was directing me and I still didn't clearly see where I should sit, I just started to walk straight ahead. As I neared the front, the judge yelled at me to stop and pointed to the chair I should take. Geesh! I'm new at this! And Holy cow! I have to walk right behind the accused and then practically sit on his lap!? Imagine this part of the courtroom to be a rectangle. The judge was the long line at the top. The jury was the short line on the left. The lawyers and the accused were the long line at the bottom and I and the heat were the short line on the right with me closest to bottom.
Before I sat down I was sworn in. "I do." Two simple words that somehow made the judge take his eyes off of whatever paperwork he had on his desk and look up at me. I was told to sit so I did. The chair was inside of a type of booth and when I looked straight ahead there was the jury. I had to turn my head to the left to see the lawyer's tables. It all seemed like such an odd way to have things set up. The lawyers were sitting close enough to each other they could compare manicures and the jurors on the far left did not have a clear visual path to the person that was testifying.
I started off in a state of controlled fear but soon relaxed. The defense lawyer was a young woman that didn't look scary and the accused wouldn't look at me at all. He was probably drilled not to do so as it would have been interpreted as aggressive. The state asked her questions and they were pretty much what we already reviewed. I think she would have hopped on the table and cheered if she could have because of how I responded.
At one point the SA asked me about how I had described the guy's build in my statement. She then asked me if anyone in the courtroom had that kind of build. Well, Mr. Law Enforcement was a big guy so he fit the bill and since up until that point I had only seen the accused seated, I had no idea what his build was. I pointed out the trooper, or whatever he was. They jury laughed and the judge made a face. The SA asked the judge if she could ask the accused to stand and was given permission. The second he stood up I recognized him as the man. There was no doubt in my mind and I said so.
The defense lawyer(dl) now had her turn. I was all set for battle but there wasn't one. I wondered if she had given up because she didn't believe his innocense so didn't care and was just doing the minimum. I found out later that he had concocted some insane story in his defense that no one in their right mind would believe...even if it were a movie of the week. The dl asked me why I had to wear glasses. I told her it was because I have an astigmatism. She then asked me to explain what that is. I'm sure she wasn't expecting my trying to describe the deformity to the lens of the eyeball that causes it. Eventually she asked me a very stupid question. She said, "So, without your glasses your vision is blurry." I know. That wasn't really a question, but I had an answer. I looked at her and said, "Hence the glasses." I was proud of myself as I had made the jury laugh again! Even the judge and the trooper had to smile.
The SA had just a few follow-up questions for clarification purposes and then the judge told me I was excused to go. As I was getting my purse and standing up to leave he said, "That was a special testimony."
The guy ended up being found guilty. He was sentenced to 30 years. The SA thinks he will have to serve about 24 of those.
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