After 3 1/2 months, I have learned what Lolly's life must have been like just by how she reacts to what goes on around her.
First, let's discuss her physically. She has stretch marks on her belly and the skin hangs. This is because she was bred over and over again.
You can't really tell from this pic, but even though she looks like a Chihuahua, her markings are Jack Russell and boy does she act like one! She can jump vertically at least 3 feet in the air from a stationary position no problem. I have seen her do a 360 degree twist in the air. She plays with toys by tossing them around and growling them. When it is just her and I on a walk, she keeps the pace quick. She barks at loud vehicles, like trucks and motorcycles, that pass by with a ferocity that means business. She's a little machine and I love that about her.
Senator, my 20 lb Tuxedo cat, was used to ruling the roost. Imagine his surprise when he met Lolly and she was having none of it! She is fearless when it comes to Senator so it's her way or the highway. They've come to an agreement of sorts and I only have to reign her in a few times a day now.
Lolly is very particular when it comes to men. She sizes them up quickly, like she can see into their hearts, and if you don't pass, she lets you know it. I did see something amazing, though, during one of our walks. We were stopped because one or the other smelled something interesting in the grass. I looked over and saw a man walking our way. He was dressed in white with paint spatters all over. There was something about him. I immediately recognized that he was gentle and kind.
As I said, Lolly doesn't trust men but as he came closer both of the dog's heads popped up and noticed him. I knew Poppy would be friendly; I was waiting to see what Lolly did. She started wagging her tail! Both dogs waited for him to get closer in the hopes he would stop and pet them, which he did. He spoke mostly Spanish so our communication was more in smiles while he crouched down and gave each dog loving. That is the only time, so far, that I have seen Lolly immediately give her trust away to a man.
I think she views life as eat or be eaten. Take no prisoners. Lolly likes to quote part of a speech Blake made to the sales team in the movie Glengarry Glen Ross, "Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for closers only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you."
But, if you look at the pic above, you see a dog that is still expecting the worst. When I call her to go out, I have to go looking for her because instead of running to me with exuberance, like Pop does, she is lying on her back, belly up, in a submissive position. When I pick her up it is like lifting a wet noodle. She doesn't perk back up until we are out of the house.
The broom is her arch enemy, even more than Senator. I was horrified the first time I went to sweep the floor. She took one look at it and became extremely aggressive. I thought to myself, "So, someone teased and attacked you with a broom - repeatedly."
Since I've been sick, I've had both dogs on the bed with me while I've napped. One afternoon I reached over to scratch Lolly's sides while making a "ch-ch-ch" noise. She whipped her head around growling and showing her teeth. Poppy sees these things I do as they are meant - being playful. Not Lolly. This was torture.
When I first got her and would pick her up, she would grab onto me and try to get up on my shoulder. Through repetition, she has learned that my arms are a safe place and she can relax. When I put her on the bed, she would scramble out of my arms out of fear. Now she waits to be gently placed on the bed. She used to growl when I kissed her head. Now she accepts the affection. Lolly is learning confidence in love, safety in love, and that fear and self-preservation are not necessary.
I thought she had come a long way in a short period of time until this morning's picture taking session. While she has made some strides, my desire for her to be happy has caused me to have unrealistic goals. It doesn't matter, though. She is here to stay and with time will blossom into the dog she was always supposed to be.
