Bits and Pieces

Eating at my desk

I realize this isn't the prettiest picture I have ever posted but I had to share.  It's like someone that saw an accident and had to share the gory details with anyone that would stand still long enough to listen.

Sometimes I eat a microwave meal (TV dinner for those that are my age) at work because I didn't have time to prepare something before leaving home.  This mess is Swanson's turkey, gravy & stuffing, mashed potato entree.   As I was sitting at my desk eating it while working, I looked down and realized that I was eating the turkey and stuffing from the bottom and the mashed potatoes from the top.  WTF!  I scared myself.  What holy hell does some part of my brain create?

Poppy getting cozy on the couch

Here is a cute picture of Poppy I took last night to get rid of the above thoughts and images.

Tacked onto a tree at the Myakka City post office's parking lot 

For those that aren't in the know, Myakka City has one flashing traffic light and a lot of farm land and livestock.  When the weather affords it and I roll my car windows down, my commute from Sarasota to Myakka can be quite fragrant!  

One of the things I do on my way in is stop at the post office to pick up the company mail.  The pick up service hours (post office jargon for when a post office employee is available and at the window to help customers) this post office offers are Monday-Friday 9:00am - 11:00am then 1:00pm - 4:00pm; Saturday 10:00am - 12:00pm.  Lucky for me the lobby hours are 24/7.   

This morning, as I pulled into my regular parking spot, I noticed the above sign tacked, literally with office type thumb tacks, to a tree.  This tree is located at the end of a parking spot so if someone ignored the length of the parking space they would immediately hit the tree.  Here is my ultra-creative picture I just drew in the paint program so that you would know what I mean:

The green oval is the tree and the grey rectangle is the parking space....in case you couldn't figure that out for yourself and you thought I was attempting a self-portrait.  

I sat in my car looking at the sign trying to figure it out.  Slow down.  Slow down?  I'm in a parking lot.  What was the meaning the artist was trying to convey?  Then I read the response written in black under the colorful command.  I hope you laughed, too.

The beauty of Myakka City

Easier on the eye than my lunch pic, huh?

Lastly, a round of applause for my 2006 Ford Taurus SE:

And you thought FORD stood for Found On Road Dead

It's the law

One night last week, after working all day, driving an hour to get home, feeding the critters, and walking the dog, I ventured back out of the house to make a Publix run.  It is a short drive and I managed to find a most excellent parking spot.  After I got out of the car and started walking to the store entrance, I was nearly shoulder to shoulder with a member of law enforcement.  He confidently and with an air of grandiose ego law enforcement obnoxiousness moved ahead of me.  My immediate reaction was my gut clenching with annoyance but then I shot his back with a quick once over.

His head was a buzz cut and his uniform was dark green.   He looked surprising old to still be on the streets and not doing desk work.  Maybe he just isn't that good and never got promoted.

Sitting low on his waist he had on his super hero belt with all of its interesting and deadly gadgets intact. I bypassed his ass.  I was just not interested.  Then I saw his shoes.  What the heck?!  They were so shiny and perfect in their patent leather awesomeness!  Light rays from the Publix signage bounced off of them.  How does a cop, or sheriff's office deputy, or whatever manage to keep his shoes so clean?  Did he not have to run down any bad guys?  Did he not have to ummm....do his JOB.....and in the process get his shoes dirty?

The Publix near my house is small.  Instead of visiting and feeling regular sized, one feels like they are a part of a dollhouse.  I'm not sure what they were thinking when they decided to move into the space.  Maybe it was, "Let's find enough space to stock it with half the stuff we normally sell so when people walk the aisles they won't have trouble deciding what to buy because there isn't much stuff."  To make up for the lack of space to put stuff and sell stuff, someone decided to make the entry area unnecessarily large.  (Is this the same as when men buy large trucks?)

So, I'm still behind Mr. Law Enforcement when he stops to pick up a hand basket.  I need a basket too so I stop.  I wait as he chats up the homeless population 4 deep sitting on the long bench against the wall that one must walk by in order to get into the second door which leads the shopper to the inner sanctum of shopping.  As Mr. L. E., officer to you, is talking I am staring at the pile of hand baskets willing him to get started.  He reaches down and lifts up the top basket and I am thinking, "Finally!" but wait!  He lifts up the basket under the top basket, too.  He then lifts in unison the top two baskets and takes the 3rd one down.  What?  WHAT?

Does her really think the 3rd one down is cleaner, newer, better?  Why is the 3rd one down better?  Have the germs had more time to die on it?  Then it dawned on me.  That's why his shoes are so clean.  One word - OCD.  Okay, not one word but one acronym.  Anyway, he's a little spit shine crazy, isn't he?

Now it was my turn to pick up a basket.  I looked in the top one and no garbage was in it so I took it.