Dr. Lupo is always late to his appointments. I resigned myself to that fact when I first starting seeing him. On the other hand, he never rushes in and rushes out. He spends as much time with you as needed and you never feel like you are a pain in the ass to him. He is slightly built with sharp features and a sharp wit. Here is the doctor that watches me for signs of cancer and he always has me laughing. An office visit with the potential of feeling like a wake is instead filled with his bright personality that doesn't allow the darkness to squeeze itself in.
I have answered all of the required questions and filled out the forms on the clipboard. I've been weighed and brought back to one of the exam rooms and told it was a temporary pit stop because I will be moved to the room with the ultrasound equipment shortly. While waiting, I read my book and it helps me remove myself from the current situation, but not for long. I reach over to the left side of my neck with my right hand and find the nodule. OK. It's still there and I didn't imagine it. It hasn't miraculously disappeared. I am right to be here.
The nurse comes in, retrieves me, and we walk to the exam room with the ultrasound equipment and I am told that Dr. Lupo will be in soon to see me. We all know it will be more than a few minutes so I hunker down again, find my place in the book, and continue reading.
There is the quiet knock on the door and in walks my doc. I once again notice his black hair and slender fingers. His smile softens his features and puts me at ease. I do believe he must have changed barbers or hairdressers because I really like the way his hair is cut but I don't have the nerve to broach the topic. It would probably come out all wrong and then I would be stepping all over myself trying to dig my way out of an increasingly embarrassing situation.
He thanks me for being there. Say what?! You heard right, sister. He thanked me for coming in. I try to turn it around and I thank him for making room for me today. He laughs it off and says, "With your history I said bring her on in. We'll take a look at what the problem is."
I show him where the nodule is located and he palpates it. He doesn't think it is a lymph node but lets get the ultrasound going so we have more information. I move to the table and lie down. We get under way and he's thinking out loud and tells me so. I tell him I would rather hear that than nothing.
There appears to be blood flowing through it so he suggests a fine needle biopsy. I've been through those before and they are far from enjoyable. Like another solar system away from enjoyable. I would say galaxy but that would be pushing it.
He gets his nurse in the room and jokes are flying and I can't help but laugh which gets his nurse quietly giggling. Ice is the numbing agent as the lump in question is close to the surface. First needle, second needle, third needle. Done. I take in a deep breath and let it out. Dr. Lupo comments, "Well, she's still breathing." He gives me ice wrapped in gauze and tells me to hold it there while he and his nurse exit.
When they return Dr. Lupo isn't smiling. He looks worried when he tells me that it is in fact a lymph node and he wants to take one more biopsy and this one will hurt more than the others. When he left it was to look at some of the material under his own microscope and that is what he discovered. It is lymph tissue.
I put on my life jacket because the waves have started to crash into the boat and I'll be damned if I am going down. Ice, needle, pain, done. Doc then tells me it hurt more because it was a larger gauge needle to get more tissue but he didn't want to scare me.
I will hear something in 3 to 10 days. If the results are conclusive, it will be closer to the 3 days. If more testing is needed it will be closer to the 10 days. His office will call me and either give me the news over the phone or ask me to come in.
In my head there is now a clock with a countdown. The only time I don't hear it ticking is when I am asleep.
No comments:
Post a Comment